Again, today was worst than yesterday. It's really like roller coaster, one day can be good the other day can be not good. She was again teary. I didn't expect this as she got enough sleep today and yesterday was so good.

She kept asking me to accompany inside. Since I refused, so most of the time she was together with me in front of the classroom.
At 10.30, I decided to accompany her in the classroom. So she started to pick her work and she did a lot of works. But I need to accompany up until lunch time.

This is quite annoying as I will leave her on Monday.

...It was the most beautiful day during our times at school. She was so cooperative, cheerful, friendly, and not teary. One of the important reasons is because she really got enough sleep. This is important to make the day successful although this is not the only reason. 

She was working on so many materials and together with friends. I saw only smile.. smile.. smile..

...Today I was talking with the Principal for almost 2 hrs. I remember that the children hasn't had their breakfast when I left Phoenix in the classroom, meaning that it was still before 9. We just finished talking few mins before 11. During these time, I heard Phoenix talked loud saying she wants to look for me and then cried. It was almost 2 hrs she did that.  Am pretty sure that she got tired crying and screaming.

The conclusion of the discussion was that we agreed to do a mild and moderate transition to Phoenix as I decided to leave her in the classroom starting next week. We both agreed that even now or later, Phoenix's response will be the same. So why don't we do it soon.

Below are our strategies:
1. Phoenix will not be enforced to be in the classroom. Therefore if she wants to go down and look for me, just let her go as Gayek will be waiting at the lobby.
2. She can bring her keropi.
3. Her food will be provided on the table in the classroom.
4. We will do the practical life work at home as hopefully it can be the bridge between home and school.
5. I will need to socialize this plan to Phoenix often so she can prepare herself too.

The main concern is how to make the transition as seamless as we can so it will not cause the traumatic event to her, be it in short term or long term.

We will start this soon and I realized that the first thing to be prepared is actually.... 
MY HEART.

...Today is much better as she got enough sleep last nite. She did a lot of montessori works and didn't ask me to accompany her in the classroom. So I was just sitting in front of the classroom and Phoenix was just back and forth to check me there.

Hopefully it gets better and better..

Today Phoenix was so cranky. She just felt a sleep at 10 last nite. At 3-5am, she woke up and couldn't go back to sleep. Means that she was just sleeping for 8 hrs and it's not enough. Most of the time she was crying. The most reason is because I insisted her to get inside the classroom but she asked me to join her but I rejected. 

As she was so sleepy, I decided to go home early at 11. So she didn't have her lunch at school. She was falling a sleep on the way home.

*Today is even worst than the real first day*

This week, Phoenix stayed at home as she got fever since Sunday night. Her highest temperature was 39.4C on Wed night. We met the doctor and he diagnosed it as virus. Roseola *again*. He said that he was pretty sure that it was not bacteria considering the symptoms. So Phoenix didn't need to do the lab test to avoid unnecessary treatment. 

She was still having fever until Friday so she didn't go to school for the full week. Bet that it will be difficult at the school as we will start it all over again.

This second week is still tough. Phoenix didn't want to be left at the classroom. I still need to sit in front of the classroom. On Wednesday, I decided to try leaving her in the classroom but telling Phoenix before i went downstairs. Guess what? Failed! She asked to go down with me although she was busy doing something when I met her.

On Thursday, I decided to go downstairs when I saw her having fun with the stuff, this time without telling her as it was failed yesterday. 15mins sitting downstairs until I heard she was crying so loud and called me. I went to the second floor but stood still as I expected that the teacher can help her to stop crying. 10 mins passed, but she was still crying. Then I decided to meet her and found out that the teacher was holding her hand while she was trying to get outside. The door was also locked.

Drama!

When the teacher saw me, she let her go and unlock the door. Since then, I cannot leave Phoenix even for a second. It was worst. I need to sit inside the classroom.

Day 5 of the second week, it feels like the second day of the school. 

One action which was decided within 25mins turns into a week regret.

*this shall too pass*

It's been 5 days already that we went to school. It was still hard and teary and bring us to the highest stress level. Really hope that this adjustment will be ending soon and we can be more relax.

Phoenix has made another friendship today, Niki. So most of the time, Niki and Rega are working together with Phoenix. Hopefully it is a good signal that can make her feeling comfortable to stay at the classroom.

Even afterschool, they are still playing together. I didn't insist her to go home soon as I really hope that she will make a bonding with friends. For now, this is the only reason I can 'sell' in the morning so she will be happy to go to school.

I was also talking to her leader teacher in the classroom. She told that the principal has discussed about this matter too and the teachers will follow this arrangement for Phoenix.
For me, it seems like we are still in the middle of nowhere.

Today, Phoenix woke up at 6.40. Everything was quiet well as I considered crying and her back and forth efforts to check me outside the classroom as usual. I sent text to the principal concerning about Phoenix' eating habit and how we (us and the school) are going to handle this together in a soft and fun way for her.

But my discussion was several times being interrupted by Phoenix. She kept looking for me. In the middle of discussion, Phoenix went outside for the water play. But not too long until she shown up again, crying. The reason is someone was splashing water to her head. She doesn't like to get wet on hair, so it was bothering her so much. 

About the discussion itself, the result is that school agree to be more moderate to Phoenix as she needs time to adjust herself to the school's schedule including meal time. At least, there's a positive respond from the school. 

Really hope that this too will pass.

Today, Phoenix woke up at 7.30. She had breakfast in the car on the way to school. Today, still didn't go well. She kept going downstairs, cried when someone wanted to do painting too so she need to share the paintbrush but she didn't want, cried when a friend insisted to take the paintbrush from her, etc etc. 

So basically, I will share Phoenix' experience during the first week at school. This one is the story about the second day at school. All and all, it didn't go that well. There were a lot of challenges to keep Phoenix stayed in the classroom. 

Today, I took Phoenix from the bed. She just woke up in front of the school. But we arrived at 8.00, good for her so she can do the outdoor play. She was so happy to play with the rabbits and car. She wanted to play in the trampolin but because there were too many people there, she was afraid to try. 

Then the KG group got into the classroom. Phoenix joined the line up. During the circle time, Phoenix was confused because everyone were singing and dancing following the song, but she doesn't know the songs at all. So she felt kind of awkward. So she kept coming to me or washing hand or taking water to drink or asking to go down. I get stressed *phiuuuuhhhfffffff*

After circle time, it was breakfast. This one, Phoenix enjoyed it so much especially the cereal. After that they had montessori work time. Phoenix was working on the jar with water, blocks, cylinder, but not too many works as she kept going downstairs. I'm still sitting in the corner of the classroom beside the door.

During this montessori time, Phoenix was asking to eat something, but as it was meal time, so she wasn't allowed to eat. Then she came to me crying and said that she is hungry. We went downstairs and got the food from the car. I made the deal, she can eat bread but do it upstairs in front of the class. She agreed. She was really hungry. She ate the bread so quick. After that, we got back inside and work other things.

Time flies too long for me *inhale exhale*. But finally, it was the lunch time. At first, Phoenix ate by herself, but only a moment, she saw other friends were chasing each other, so she joined. Her teacher called her name several times to make her stop, but she didn't listen. 

Then we went downstairs but as some friends were playing, she joined again. She was so happy.

The good thing is she made friend with Rega. So at least we have something to 'sell' when we are asking her to go to school. Hopefully, this is the good sign. *keep praying*

So here is the short background. We decide that Phoenix should go to school soon since I plan to go back to work. So Phoenix and I moved back to Jakarta in January 2013 to find the best school for her. Thru the searching, we agree that we prefer the montessori school for Phoenix. Then we started to do the trial at some schools.

We've done trial at several schools that we thought are valuable and most of them are the montessori schools. But then we found out that several schools are not really applying  montessori standard. There are several criterias that we used to decide whether it's a good school for us or not. After long discussion with the specific school and daddy as the father and fund holder :p, we decided to enroll Phoenix to one school in Jagakarsa.

Honestly, this is our decision, not Phoenix'. Phoenix actually loves another school which is 3 times more expensive than this school. So you can imagine how luxury the school is. But before the money, there's something else more important to me that I don't agree with the school, which is the food served. It will ruin the eating habit that I've hardly developed to Phoenix. It's really a difficult decision to make.

So today is the first day she's going to school. Other challenge is she cannot sleep early means she cannot wake up early too. So we were late today, I took her to the car while she was still sleeping. But when we reached the car, she woke up. We arrived at 8.30. The school schedule is from 8.00 to 12.00, 5 days a week.


She joined the class during circle time, so everyone were singing. Phoenix felt a bit awkward but she wanted to join the circle. After circle time, they have breakfast. Phoenix ate cereal by herself but I think just a bit. After that was the montessori work time. Each child should pick their own work or the teacher will pick it for them. Phoenix was a bit confused on what to do. But the good thing is she got friend, Rega. It's a good thing that can make Phoenix stayed in the classroom. Sometimes, Phoenix was still asking to get outside the classroom, but some teachers told me that it's normal as she is still adjusting herself and she might love to explore the new place.

At 11.30, they have lunch. Phoenix ate her own food but only a while. Then she got bored.So I take over and fed her.

At 12.20, the class is finished but Phoenix asked to play in the playground. So we played about 20mins before going home.

So the first day is quite huffttttttt..
Pray for tomorrow *finger crossed*